Global Posts

by Martin Hamel

—Let me introduce myself. I’m a 27 year old man with a degree in television production who watches wrestling pretty regularly. Matt asked me to help fill in from time to time on shows he didn’t catch or can’t stand watching(Smackdown) As far as were I’m coming from, I of course got into wrestling during it’s heyday but stopped watching when everyone else did. I recently returned when I got DVR and could record the shows and watch them at my leisure. My views might be a bit skewed from the average wrestling fan and if you feel differently about something be sure to leave a comment. I am by no means an expert.—

We start with a coffin in the ring which the Undertaker, after a nice little speech about him burying the Big Show Alive, emerges from to the crowd’s raucous approval. Jeff Hardy shows up on the Jumbotron in spook makeup, badly acting as if he’s come unchained.

So the Undertaker has gone back full swing to I’m evil and will swallow your soul. I know much has been made of the numerous incarnations of the Undertaker and you have to hand it to the guy, he plays the gig well, but I can’t help looking at him and start thinking “If you’re so evil, why do you have on sparring gloves? Did the Devil give him those?” There’s a point where the suspension of disbelief finally snaps and the logic just unravels. That having been said still looking forward to this match.

Matt Hardy gets the win over Shelton Benjamin, with the Twist of Fate

This was a very good technical match that also showcased Benjamin’s athleticism. Unfortunately it also helped to bring into light how old Matt Hardy is in body if not in years. It might be because you are constantly comparing him to his brother, but Matt’s style just seems kind of stale. Not that that’s a terrible thing. He’s still more fun to watch than most wrestlers on the WWE roster.

P.S. I really like Shelton. I pray he keeps getting a push.

The Brian Kendrick gets the win over Carlito by hitting The Kendrick (aka Sliced Bread #2)

Gotta say this match was enjoyable. I’m a big fan of Carlito and Kendrick has won me over. Looks like Kendrick’s main event push is over, but I think it’s a good thing. He needs a smaller opponent to shine.

Jeff Hardy interrupts the contract signing of Triple H/Kozlov by putting Kozlov through a table

Now we will see that triple threat that was one of the options for Cyber Sunday.

Kung Fu Naki gets the win over MVP after Khali distracts him. Then Khali has the ugliest woman in Great Britain make out with a supposedly unconscious MVP.

I hate the Great Khali, I hate forced comedy, and I hate the Khali Kiss Cam. I also feel bad for MVP. The man can wrestle and now he’s being forced into being Khali’s whipping boy. I think I became briefly gay during this segment. When is the WWE gonna learn that giant guy’s who can’t wrestle, can’t wrestle. Awful.

Michelle McCool gets the win over Maria to retain the Divas Championship.

I look at women’s wrestling in the WWE the way I look at women’s basketball. It’s nice to look at, but way too sloppy to be taken seriously. Also Maria is hot!

Jeff Hardy gets the win over the Undertaker after some interference from The Big Show.

This was a decent match but after hearing the word extreme so many times it has lost all meaning. I do like that Tazz and J.R. seemed to get into a nickname contest at one point. I have always liked Hardy and love the fact that he’s willing to put everything on the line to entertain. JR called the Undertaker evil numerous times during the match. I haven’t seen him do anything remotely evil on that show yet. He should eat a kitten or push an old person down the stairs. That’s evil.

—All in all a placeholder to push the stories towards Survivor Series. Couple of notes before I leave,

-Apparently Smackdown is the place for endless promos. I have seen so many promos for Kizarney and Hurra-pops that I hate these guys already and they haven’t made their debut.

-I understand that the WWE wanted to stay on network TV and there were no other options, but any commercials I see for other shows on MyNetwork make me hate humanity. I don’t think that’s the feeling they are going for.—

- Batista/Randy Orton/Stephanie McMahon Segment

[Reaction: First of all, why is Batista out for an interview in his tights? Did he really think he would get a World title shot in the first segment of the show? At least Randy Orton got the memo. It was also nice to see they are continuing with the McMahon storyline even though that was a horribly produced segment. It was CLEARLY prerecording but yet they still tried to pass it off as live. I did like the fact that Stephanie announced all the matches for the show right then. It gave it a real "Attitude-era" feel where you didn’t really know what you were going to get to see.]

- Santino Marella versus William Regal for the Intercontinental Title

[Reaction: Poor Santino although I do have a feeling he’ll win it back and somehow this change will have never happened. If not, I am glad they killed this angle before it grew stale and overbearing.]

- D’Lo Brown versus Mike Knox

[Reaction: This is was what they were hyping for the past month? At least have Knox dominate the match alittle bit more and not just hit his finisher. Very unspectacular.

- Chris Jericho Interview

[Reaction: Ok so he hypes all of his other potential opponents but not really the one he has tonight. And no interview segment for HBK at all! This is supposed to be their blowoff match after a 4 month program, give them some damn airtime!]

- Rey Mysterio versus Kane in a No Disqualification Match

[Reaction: So this feud is over now right? We don’t have to watch Kane’s character get slowly killed off every week? Lemme guess, next week it’s going to be revealed that Mike Knox killed Kane’s baby making him a bigger bad ass than Kane and suddenly Kane will be a face again.]

- Randy Orton/Priceless Segment

[Reaction: I’m still not sold on Cody Rhodes as the cocky new kid. I feel like the lineup should read like this (compared to the 4 Horsemen): Randy Orton playing the Ric Flair role, Ted DiBiase as Tully Blanchard, Manu as Ole Anderson and Rhodes as Arn. That way Orton and DiBiase can do most of the talking with Rhodes just chiming in now and then with Manu just needing to look tough.]

- Cody Rhodes versus Batista

[Reaction: My interpretation on how the production meeting went on this one:

"Ok so Orton isn’t going to face Batista. Cody is gonna come down and say he is going to prove how tough he is and challenge Batista."

"Alright, alright cool. Good way to build the kid up."

"Then Big Dave wins in no more than 3 minutes."

"Oh…"

"And then spear Manu just for the helluva it. Should get a good pop."

"Well..."

"OH! And then he chases a fleeing Orton out of the building."

"SOLD!"

Yea, way to give the rub to the new guys. Dennis Rodman made Screech look better on CCW.]

- Beth Phoenix with Santino Marella versus Mickie James for the Women’s Title

[Reaction: Do they only have 2 competent women wrestlers on Raw? It sure seems like it.]

- Chris Jericho versus Shawn Michaels in a Last Man Standing Match

[Reaction: Ok when I first saw this match, I was unimpressed. After reading all of the online praise for both Michaels and Jericho, I took the time to watch it again. In all honestly, it was a good TV match but something was missing. I am glad they gave them enough time to properly end this feud but I think I would have liked something a little more dramatic. A HBK promo would have probably helped and maybe a week to promote it too. It just felt rushed and like it was 2 very, very good performers doing their best working with a less than ideal situation. I was able to get more excited for this week’s Hardy/Undertaker match than I was for this match because of the lack of promotion. But that’s just one man’s opinion.]

There has been much criticism lately about the current storylines and how they seem to be “out of touch” with today’s culture. In my previous article, I took a brief look at some of the more prominent stories headlining the shows in pro wrestling. Now I intend to take a look at some of the major shows in the business today and what direction their respective companies might be sending them.

Raw:

- “The New GM?”

o Can anyone remember when the role of General Manager added to the quality of the program instead of being just another segment that we have to sit through? I would have to actually go back to the very first set of general managers, Eric Bischoff and Stephanie McMahon. Bischoff had already established his character in WCW and Stephanie is just simply a McMahon. Since that combination, the role of general manager has truly been hit or miss. Paul Heyman played the role well but Teddy Long has been brutal from the beginning and has yet to get better. Vickie Guerrero is just a joke and all the others were largely forgettable. But now it seems like we could be seeing a new spin on the authority figure with the sibling rivalry of Shane and Stephanie McMahon. We all know that the McMahons equal ratings and that’s exactly what the WWE desperately needs. A feud between Shane and Stephanie McMahon would be ratings gold. They were on screen a total of 10 minutes this past Raw and already people are drooling for more. Shane and Orton had immediate chemistry in the ring and Stephanie can instantly make any audience turn against her, or fall deeply in love with her. This just might be the storyline backbone that the entire company needs as a spark. The only problem with this scenario is Shane’s lack of desire for being on camera. He would much rather stay on the corporate side of things and be able to be home every night for dinner with his family. This will be the one factor that will make this angle sink or swim.

- “Randy Orton & Priceless”

o Ted DiBiase in Randy Orton’s Priceless will have the same fate as Orton in Evolution. The slooooooooow build for this whole angle has played out very well with the audience chomping on the bit for the 4 men to just join together and take over the Raw brand. Its about time that a dominant group of men ran roughshod over the WWE and all 4 of these men have the pedigree to reign on top for a long time. DiBiase will be the breakout star of this crew and a feud with Orton will headline at least 2 Pay Per Views in 2009.

Smackdown:

- “Battle of the Big Men”

o The Undertaker and the Big Show are once again embroiled in a feud. And surprisingly its no more exciting than the first 3 times they attempted it. The Big Show could have very well been on the same career resurgence as Chris Jericho but instead he ended up stuck in 1999. The Big Show would be more suited in a program with Edge as the heel and the Undertaker could be giving the rub to MVP or Ezekiel Jackson, both of who could move up the ladder extremely fast with the right program. Its time to move on from the “go-to” matchups between men who have worked numerous times before. Try something new. You never know when you’ll strike oil.

ECW:

- “New Talent Initiative”

o Evan Bourne. Jack Swagger. Ricky Ortiz. These are just 3 men who have done their damnest to make their mark with the opportunities they have been presented. Now with FCW having a weekly television slot, superstars like Joe Henning and Kizarny are being allowed to develop a fan base even before hitting the big time. ECW might not be the most exciting hour of television but being able to see these future major players on a smaller stage is definitely a treat.

TNA:

- “Main Event Mafia vs. TNA Originals”

o This angle was another slow build, beginning with Booker T and Sting probably before anyone really realized what was going on. TNA’s timing capitalized on constant “backstage reporting” on how the veterans were holding the younger talent down. The MEM have a nice dynamic of personalities and abilities and have just the right amount of accolades to make it believable. Sting was able to pull off a slow heel turn to relatively good results. Essentially, creative combined all the successful feuds from the past year and threw them all into one pot. I just wish they would focus on a few TNA Originals along with Joe and Styles instead of a rotating group of mid-carders. But yet I still feel that finally TNA was able to strike cord with a major angle that could develop into something huge.

- “Foley in Charge”

o As I stated in my last article, Foley at the top of the creative food chain could be the best thing to happen in the history of TNA. His creative mind is probably the most valuable resource they’ve acquired in the past year but now its up to them to realize this and capitalize on it. Only time will tell.

The potential for each of these shows is pretty high and it’s been awhile since anyone has been able to say that. But history is against them. As with the Orton/Punk program, the blow offs for some of the biggest angles in the past few years have been lackluster at best. Even the Ladder Match climax of the Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho feud (while a classic), did not provide the closure that many angles need in order to feel complete. And this was widely considered to be one of the best storylines of the past 5 years. It just goes to show how the standards have fallen slightly across the board and that is the main dilemma that needs to be addressed before things can begin to improve.

- Randy Orton’s music hit and he came out to the ring. He reminded us of the ultimatum he gave to Shane and Stephanie McMahon.

[Reaction: I love the slow build they’ve given Orton’s return. He is a major player and will be for years to come, I’m glad they decided to treat him that way.]

- Jeff Hardy and Matt Hardy defeated MVP and The Brian Kendrick (with Ezekiel Jackson) in 4:13.

[Reaction: Simple squash match to showcase two men who have been a big part of Raw over the years. I would have liked to see Kendrick and MVP with a little more offense to capitalize on the rub but I guess it wasn’t meant to be.]

- William Regal won a battle royal that included Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, Jamie Noble, Manu, Snitsky, JTG, and Shad in to win an Intercontinental Championship Match in 3:25.

[Reaction: Was anyone else rooting for Ted DiBiase once he eliminated the other members of Priceless? I was truly marking out for this kid.]

- Randy Orton/Shane McMahon/Mike Adamle segment.

[Reaction: Shane McMahon will always get a reaction, the son could be more popular than the father ever was but has always been shy of the limelight. I was fine with Adamle resigning; it might have been the one true pop he would have ever received.]

- Vladimir Kozlov defeated Bret “The Hitman” Haas in :23.

[Reaction: Haas is the epitome of what a man should do with the spot he is given. Keep your mouth shut and do your damnest to get it over. Too bad he was just fed to the Moscow Mauler.]

- Degeneration X defeated John Morrison and The Miz in 6:32.

[Reaction: Let me start out by saying that I hate the Miz. I think he is a reality show leech who somehow weaseled his way into a contact. That being said, the man has stepped up his game and is living out his dream. I just wish he had to pay his dues. As far as the match goes, it was pretty standard although I am glad Morrison & Miz got some good offense in. Yes they we built up just to be fed to DX, but I do feel they gained some strength from this brief program.]

- Beth Phoenix pinned Mae Young to win a 16-diva tag match for her team in 1:33.

[Reaction: …..whatever]

- C.M. Punk defeated Randy Orton by disqualification in 2:51.

[Reaction: Last month this was a main event program in the making. Now, it was a 3-minute match with no payoff and the crowd rooting for the heel by the end. Can’t help but feel like they missed the mark with these two. Maybe they’ll be able to salvage something for this program but it’s going to be much more difficult now.]

- The Undertaker defeated JBL by countout in 2:53.

[Reaction: Simple segment that brought the Deadman back to Raw and furthered the JBL/Michaels storyline without getting too convoluted.]

- Kung Fu Naki, Hornswoggle, The Boogey Man, Jesse and Festus, Jim Duggan, Sergeant Slaughter, Dusty Rhodes, and Goldust danced in the ring. Goldust kissed Cole. Ron Simmons came out to the stage and gave his line.

[Reaction: Does today’s wrestling fan even remember who all these people are? I’d be surprised if half the people in the arena have seen Slaughter or Rhodes in the ring.]

- Kane and Mark Henry defeated Rey Mysterio and Kofi Kingston in 2:23.

[Poor Kofi being thrown into Evan Bourne’s spot with no warning. This just seemed like a spot to get some of the bigger names onto the card and was a little out of place.]

- Backstage, Stephanie sat down next to Shane. Stephanie said she loved Shane’s announcement but to keep the surprises to a minimum. Shane wished Vince could be there. Steph agreed that Vince would be proud to see how well they were doing.

[Can anyone else see these two as the new GMs of Raw and Smackdown? Too bad there are so many reasons why it wouldn’t happen (look for my next article).]

- Chris Jericho defeated Batista in a steel cage match to win the World Heavyweight Championship in 15:34.

[Reaction: Nothing against Batista but the Raw brand works a bit better right now with a heel on the top and almost everyone loves to hate Jericho. He might not be selling a load of t-shirts but he will be selling tickets to people who want to see him get his ass kicked.]